don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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