Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Shame - the story of my life.
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