He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
