Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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