theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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