White coat. Heels.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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