oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
