He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize
