Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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