I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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