I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
