Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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