I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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