She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
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