How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
