I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Randomize
