You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Randomize
