At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
