Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Randomize
