new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Randomize
