Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize