so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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