is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
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