You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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