Fine. I'll sleep in my office
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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