My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
