guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize
