I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
