im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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