Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Randomize
