She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
