Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
