She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I just had sex on a roof
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize
