Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
