We're facebook friends in real life
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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