got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
