I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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