TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
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