Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
