i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
