So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Randomize
