i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
