So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
