one might say we're banned from that church
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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