dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
