we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Randomize
