so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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