go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
