Your face is a jimmy john
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
