i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
We just shotgunned beers for America
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
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